An impacted truth

New Quarter

2009-07-29T19:08:00.005-04:00

California Commissions State Quarter

Across The Universe - If I Fell

2009-07-21T10:50:00.001-04:00

I never knew how good John and Paul's lyrics to this song were until I heard this slower version. Nearly 50 years old, this song is still strong.

Really strong

40 years ago

2009-07-20T07:57:00.002-04:00

Forty years ago today, July 20th, 1969, I was 11 years old. Like most 11 year olds both then and now, I was only slightly aware of my surroundings, and even less aware of the political and social achievements of our society.

And so it was on this day I was sitting with my family in Fenway Park watching the Red Sox play the Orioles in an afternoon game. Sometime in the middle of the 4th inning, the announcer said, "Ladies and gentlemen, the Apollo 11 crew has landed on the surface of the moon". 34,000 people...plus the 9 players on the field at the time... stood in unison and cheered for more than 5 minutes. It was as if the Red Sox had actually won a World Series, but even I - age 11 - knew that was never going to happen. As the wave of applause died down and play was about to resume, one of the most surreal things I've ever experienced then or now happened:

About 10 rows behind and 14 or 15 seats to my right, a man stood up with one of those long red plastic horns that were the rage in the 60's and proceeded to play "God Bless America" on it. Incredibly, all 34,000 + sat in reverent silence while he belted out that song, not one person in the entire stadium daring to move, speak, or even make a sound. It was my first .... and obviously impactful ... notice that when the USA wants to pull it together as one, they can.

And they will again.

Reflections on the 4th

2009-07-05T01:00:00.024-04:00

I think about the country sometimes when I'm not hunting Aborigine Lava Lizards or Tightrope walking between skyscrapers. In fact, today I was thinking about a man by the name of Thomas Jefferson - perhaps you've heard of him - and something he once said:

"A wise and frugal government, which shall leave men free to regulate their own pursuits of industry and improvement, and shall not take from the mouth of labor the bread it has earned - this is the sum of good government. Trust and protect your troops, your farmers, and your daily toilers, for they are the seed from which the tree of liberty bears fruit"

Today - Independence Day - we are swiftly becoming a dependant state, beholden to the government instead of the vital cog that makes the governmental machinery run. You know what I mean, all that "We the people" stuff. Well, we the people work long, hard hours to provide for our families and to make them prepared for the rigors of life, but we the people are awakening ever-too-frequently to see the results of those efforts are tantamount to trying to push the paste back into the tube. We the people are now being made - not asked mind you, made - to not only continue to provide for those who have no interest in providing for themselves, but to give more of our children's college monies, our families retirement dollars, more of our daily living sustenance to increase the financial benefits for the people to whom hard effort and achievement are merely words on a piece of paper, and not something they have any interest in pursuing themselves. We're being told they're shooting for bigger checks and better medical care for the people who watch "The Price is Right" for a living, while the rest of us dig ditches, care for the infirmed, or whatever else it is the slovenly Middle Class folks do to pay for their Rice-A-Roni and Chicken dinners. And the best part is we the people get to pay for it all. (What? Did you think Billy Bob Clooney was gonna help out? Fuuuuck no. He spent all his available cash on campaign contributions to help fund the ACORN people, and at last check, Billy Bob only made $40 Mil on his most recent shitty movie, so times are tough in the Clooney household. Yessiree buddy, it's a bitch living in the Hampton's and having to commute to Los Angeles, sometimes - gasp - commercial). So little Jared's school shoes are going to have to wait...that "price is right" guy needs more money to ignore those 7 kids he's fathered through 7 different women, aaaannnnd he needs us to pay for the doctors appointments he makes every 90 days or so to get his justification note as to why he still shouldn't go back to work. He remains unemployed - and has been since 1996, but now he's on the precipice of getting a pay raise and a sweet benefits package. It's a good gig if you can get it. Wait! You CAN get it, but you might have to downsize to a Chrysler 3000, if Chrysler is still making cars, that is. I haven't checked the news today...

We the people are being systematically raped to the breaking point, and soon the only escape will be to place our trust - our individual and collective lives - in the very hands of those who broke us in the first place. 60's counter-culture freaks who figured out the way to win their retarded war was to change the context of the battlefield (Not a real battlefield of course. Real battlefields make your hands dirty). The flowers in the rifle barrels were replaced with a law degree from Berkley, Princeton, Harvard, or wherever, the patience to wait it out, and the gavel that eventually came with it. Their time is now, and they have the assets and resources in place. With the possible exception of AM talk radio and one network on T.V., the communications apparatti are monitored and cleansed to the desired specifications, and they're pouncing on what they currently can't control with a swiftness and visciousness that makes the brain reel under the stress. Give 'em some more time, they'll get there.

Until the middle and lower-middle classes finally realize they are the prey, the slaughter will continue until all the meat has been removed from the bones. They have words for this phenomenon, words for this type of culture, those same words which used to strike a violent chord in our national psyche, words that were applied to other nations that we usually had to enter and give tens of thousands of our lives to rescue them from their plight, words which we are now perilously close to adopting, voluntarily or not, for ourselves.

The America I now live in, the America I spent the majority of my adult life defending, the America I pray every night my children and grandchildren can take solace in, bears no resemblance to the America that I once knew. And it gets more unrecognizable by the day...not the decade.

God only knows what Mr. Jefferson would think if he were standing on the steps of the Capital today. He would look across the city and see the beautiful monument built to himself, and although surely humbled and honored, he might wonder why they spent so much time and money on that building when what he really wanted was for his words to be built upon. Instead, they are ignored by people far less intellectually gifted than he, and he never even read the Harvard Law Review.

At the very least, Mr. Jefferson knew what he and his patriot friends crafted almost 250 years ago was a culture who's title began with the letter D, and in no frame of reference, inference, or intention, was it ever intended to begin with any other alphabetical symbol.

But then again, like I said in the beginning, I don't think about the country that much anyways. I'm too busy herding chinch bugs across the vast plain and hot air baloon bungee jumping to do much of anything else. Hey, just curious... do you need a home loan?

Jackson Drug Aliases

2009-07-02T18:51:00.005-04:00

Michael Jackson used a slew of aliases to score prescription meds, and we know the two names that could unlock the key to gross abuse by Jackson and some prominent doctors.We've learned Jackson frequently used the names Omar Arnold and Jack London to get powerful drugs, including Demerol. Jackson also used the name of one of his bodyguards, as well as the name of the office manager for one of his doctors.

Now...for the first time...JL4 news has discovered the list of drug aliases you DO NOT know about, and they are as follows...and remember, you heard it here first!

Puff the Magic Blunt
Arthur Hash
Heroes and Heroin
Daffy Demerol
Ken and Barbiturate
Xanex-Men IV, The return of the Greenies
Mighty Morphine Power Rangers
Oxycontin...gets the tough pains out!
Lude Skywalker
Humphry Bogart the joint
Bjorn Bong
Prince Valium
Hippity Hopped Up, Easter's on its way
Mickey Main-Liner
The Hunt For Red OX-tober
Arthur and Nexus of the Round Table
Hugh Huffer

and finally...

Peter Percopan from NeverLand

This includes the latest update from JL4 News. Okay! Everybody sing it with me...

L-S-D...

it's easy as 1-2-3...

Grandpa has a Silver Star for Valor. Don't FUCK with grandpa!

2009-07-01T19:32:00.002-04:00

A WOULD-BE thief made the worst mistake of his career after breaking into the house of a retired Army boxer. Gregory McCalium, 23, fronted court yesterday with a black eye and a fat lip after he was busted - and subsequently bashed - by 71-year-old retired First Sergeant Frank Corti in Mr Corti’s house.

Mr. Corti said he was woken in the middle of the night by noises in his house and was confronted by the knife-wielding McCalium when he went to investigate. He said McCalium “took a slash” at him, but Mr Corti ducked and threw two big right hooks at the assailant.

And Mr Corti knows how to throw a right hook – he was famous for it as a featherweight in the Army.

The blows almost knocked McCalium out, allowing Mr Corti to perform a citizens’ arrest and wait for the police to arrive. Defenndant McCalium’s lawyer told the court his client “looked like a car accident”. “Photos of the scene looked more like a murder scene,” the attorney told the court. The judge wasn’t moved, saying McCalium “got what he deserved” before sentencing him to four-and-a-half years’ jail.

Army Strong Mr. Corti! Army gottdamned Strong, Frank!!!

Next?

Like it or not, you gotta admit the boy had game. Last MJ post.

2009-06-29T16:14:00.001-04:00

Michael Jackson - Dirty Diana

2009-06-27T16:09:00.001-04:00

Yup...freakazoid and all....in his own way he could rock and roll too

Oh my myself. I swear to myself, this is the truth

2009-06-25T11:02:00.004-04:00

Hey Everybody, God here.

I just wanted to clear up a few misconceptions, misunderstandings, and outright lies that have been perpetrated down there in earthland by the Jim and Tammy Fae's over the years. Where should I start? Oh yeah...

OJ, Patsy Ramsey, and Casey Anthony did it. Yes they did. Last year I got into this heated argument at the gate. Peter called me saying Patsy was demanding entrance, and that I had better go intervene. I got there and all I could say was "Patsy...are you fucking kidding me? I'm Me, and I SAW YOU DO IT". Needless to say, she was still arguing when the Archangel Herb was placing her on the elevator and pushing the down button 17 times. You get 17 levels deeper if you fit into that special category that Patsy did. I gotta write myself a note to check up on her and see how she's doing.

Are you listening Casey??? You're getting 17 pushes yourself. Maybe 18...I'm still undecided.

Ok...now that we're laying it on the line, so to speak, let me address this issue of Allah. Those violent, illiterate, backwoods bastards think they're praying 5 times a day to ME! They even screwed up the instruction manual. Actually, I said bring "love" and those assholes thought I said "Rugs" and so they drag a piece of weather-worn carpet around in the desert to kneel on, instead of just getting the fuck down and doing it right.

Alright, back to the original sentence. When I saw how stuuuupid these idiots were, I gave them to my cousin Acknad Sooliman IV, gave him the nickname Allah, and sent those stupid ass-wipes a message to get them all in line with cousin Acknad. I clearly said "destroy all the reigns" not in favor with me, and I swear to myself I never - ever - said "destroy all the planes". Good myself in Heaven, talk about lost in translation!

Ok, let's cover this health care issue o-n-e m-o-r-e t-i-m-e. I remember it as if it were last Tuesday - actually I think it WAS last Tuesday - I told Barry..."the program is meant to support people who work, but don't get paid enough to enjoy genuinely good health care", but that dipshit somehow twisted that to say, "Even if you only make $10 an hour, I'm gonna tax the shit outta you so your lazy-assed neighbor on food stamps and welfare gets the same health considerations you do".

And this ladies and germs (I loved Miltie...had him appear at the Heavenly Oasis just the other night. I had grrreeeaaat seats!)...Oh, sorry....as I was saying, every time I say something there are whole groups of douchebags who totally fuck it up. Most of them profess this that and the other thing about themselves, but in truth they wouldn't know the difference between sacrifice and sacrilege if I sent a cobra down to bite them in the neck with it. Perhaps I should...note to self...

Jim Jones, David Koresch, Adolf Hitler, and Jerry Seinfeld immediately come to mind. Stop selling your lame bullshit to the masses, or you too will not have your contract renewed. Along those lines, I gotta be totally honest with you. I was the guy who started the "World is gonna end in 2012" crap, which I thought was hysterically funny until A&E and the Discovery Channel made millions doing stories about it, but now I'm reconsidering whether or not to really do it. I mean, I can't even get spare parts for my Hummer now that you guys have totally fucked that up, and my condo in Vail has been so depreciated I'll end up taking a major bath if I try and sell it. WTF are you all doing down there?

I created Walt Disney and gave him all that swamp land for fun and frolic, but Orlando is now the home to over a hundred intercity drug and violence related murders a year? I know I set aside that shit for D.C. because I wanted the assholes running the U.S. to be running for their cars in fear at night. But I never wanted Sea World messed with.

I'm so fed up with your behavior and attitudes, it's pissing me off in a celestial way. Yep...he's white and you're black. Deal with it or I'll be forced to deal with you. I'm not perfect myself....Myself knows I created lawyers in the mistaken belief they would provide justice in the world, but when the guy drank a fifth of Jack and killed the whole family on I-84, I didn't want you attorneys to sue Jack Daniels, you dipshits! Sue the dink who drank the shit, and get your priorities straight.

Ohhh my Myself...I have a headache. Get it right down there Myself dammit! Love thy neighbor and all that garbage, or you'll be facing the biggest shitstorm since Jesse Helms was elected in South Carolina. I mean it!

KNOCK IT THE FUCK OFF!!!

- G

Values.com

2009-06-20T17:43:00.001-04:00

Part of a series of mationwide inspirational billboards. I especially liked this one.

At it again

2009-06-20T09:16:00.009-04:00

Ever wonder why that fashion explosion of turtle necks, sweater vests and subtly checked trousers didn't catch on? Look no more. I have no idea where the hand on her shoulder is coming from; perhaps it was superimposed into the picture like the fake farm background has been to make these guys seem less gay (good luck with that).

Finally....finally....I see an album cover with some nice, wholesome, clean cut...woah!!!! "let me touch HIM"""??? Never saw that one coming, but Methinks it the title could throw off the gospel message somewhat.

The Keithen's were the original Brady family, but as you can clearly see the T.V. show only kept Alice the maid and Jan. That hair became the model for the space shuttle docking facility at Kennedy Space Center in the late 1960's. Check out "Alice's" face...she has no idea which person is goosing her at shutter-point, but they had damn sure better cut it out. In any even, the McKeithen's obviously had the same clothing rep as the Country Church folks, above.

Following his smash hit, "Poem's for Heterosexual Cats" our Irish friend Paddy created this living masterpiece. I can't see any hands in the barrel, but that dogie looks fairly spent to me. DECCA records put this one out long before their federal trial on child porn charges exposed the name DECCA was a clever play on words for decadent.

Ummmmmm...hey, what the hell? It even comes with Special Instruction Booklets (plural!). And it's two LP's to boot!

Songs like....

He likes his steak medium well....

Don't rub his foot so hard in that spot... and an all-timer favorite...

If you see him wihout a beer, get up and go get one for him

In any event, this LP lead to a complete social revolution in this country...ummm....perhaps it caused a social revolution in this country...either way....shit changed after this, an for the better by the way. Without such ground-breaking boldness as this, how could we have ever produced

THIS....

Uhhhhhhhhh....oh fuck! Since I DO believe in Miracles and I DO believe in God....oh fuck....I have nothing to say about this one....nothing....really!

You're an asshole if...

2009-06-18T20:13:00.000-04:00

Banned car add

2009-06-14T16:31:00.001-04:00

Back for more

2009-06-12T16:36:00.013-04:00

Upbound? More like hell-bound if you decide to use that ax on anything other than timber. I gotta figure "Butch''

is the one in the fabulously flowered shirt with the 17 inch long collar - however I could be wrong and Butch could be the chick **Wink** **Wink**

All your friends are dead, huh Freddie? Is that because they are in little pieces in the back of your 1968 Lincoln Continental, victims of Butch's gospel

ax?

Listen...you got one phone call. Make it count!

Oh my God in heaven! This is what Kid Rock was supposed to look like before his sex change operation. This guy makes rednecks blush with embarrassment. Check out his "Smash Hits":

I seen her first...

Ain't above lyin'... and his platinum seller...

I got sumpin dat itches

WTF?? The missing piece is about 12 inches too far right and 3 inches too far down. The name Biffy Clyro alone is a puzzle, I'll bet you no one on God's Green Earth understands the meaning behind his music. And why are those two men taking away his desk? His clothes are probably in the bottom right drawer.

Ahhhh....Abba with the backwards "B". You gotta love a Swedish group singing in English on an album titled in Spanish all the while dressed like the crew of "Lost in Space" in the Telexstar 4 Nebula.

Judy Robinson? Is that you?

The Amason twins, otherwise known by their first names, Hansel and Dorkel. If the Lord is coming again, can we get him to wear something other than my Aunt Edna's tablecloth this time? And is it just me, or do you also see their hair as being combed in-sync for this photograph?

Joyce my old friend! Joyce is making his....ummmm...her... 2nd appearance on my blog, this time for her...ummm....his... highly acclaimed album "under the knife of my Swedish sex-change surgeon". Joyce has this really cool trick she does at parties during drinking games...she shoves her pinky finger through the soft spot in her skull that came about because of that accident in '67 with the pipe fitters truck. She can roll one eye left while making a gushy squeaking sound out of the other....I guess you have to be there to appreciate the hilarity of it.

Wow! Benjamin Netanyahoo, Golda Meier, and Jamie Farr in their younger days before they decided to bomb Gaza on a regular basis. In this photo, they are spoofing Yassir Arafat calling for a cease-fire with Mosha Diane.

Hit singles include:

I gotta samaltz for ya baby...

Bomb ya? I'm gonna fuckin annihilate ya...

and everyones favorite:

My cousin Lou married a Syrian once...once!

Holy Fuckin Shit!!!!

Count my blessings???

There are so many ways looking at this cover makes me do just that. Let's start with the Jack Nicholson impressionist on the left. "You can't handle the fuckin truth, asshole". That truth being that although this was intended to be a spiritual awakening, it looks more like Bat Masterson's wake after O.K. Corral. The dude on the right with no blood circulating in his face? Your guess is as good as mine. The baby grew up to be a child singer/porn star who bailed out of heroin rehab at age 11 and is now trying to get together a reality T.V. show together called "Think your life was fucked?" So far, only Showtime has issued a feeler on the project.

The best one I've ever seen

2009-06-10T14:47:00.001-04:00

THE NEW US ARMY STRONG COMMERCIAL

2009-06-06T20:12:00.001-04:00

Good Got Damned in Heaven. I feel safe and proud.

DO YOU?

Say whaaaa?

2009-05-17T18:47:00.004-04:00

This morning I noticed one of my lawns sprinkler heads was broken, and so, I made my twice annually trip to Lowes. I went to the aisle for sprinkler heads and began my rapid descent into lost consciousness. And then...

...horror of all horrors...

...the Lowes guy was walking towards me...

...which meant he was gonna ask me what I needed...

...and then the dreaded answer was to follow.

Picture if you will yourself...you're in the Great Pyramid Cheops. You're deep in the maze of tunnels - AND YOU'RE LOST. The only language advising you how to exit before you asphyxiate is Ancient Hieroglyphics.

That's me at Lowes. We all have our talents, and mine isn't home repair. But the guy coming closer to me; the guy who patented "carpenters crack"; the guy with the 7th grade education who thinks if you don't know what a torque wrench is you're a feeble idiot - was approaching.

"How ya'll doin?" he started. I'm fine I replied, and explained to him I needed to replace my sprinkler head.

"Is it a 2 inch, 4 inch, or 6 inch okywarbler system?" he asked. Sure is, I said.

"Waaaail thiin pardner, whatchoo need is a portable macintyre tubular wrench, 'bout 2 ounces of PB Lathermeister Ointment, a co-convex scrotumizer strap, and two labia enhanced outshoot nozzles, and four piomonitored reflector pins, and ya got it made."

I looked at this man - speaking Martian - and said "thanks..."that's what I figured".

Then I drove home and looked up the number for the closest sprinkler system repair company.

Next??

Glass houses

2009-05-08T17:49:00.004-04:00

A while back.

Not so far, actually. Call it a short while.

Red Sox fans world-wide used to complain about everything...the weather, politics, this fairly insignificant issue of something like 8+ decades without a World Series win. There was even talk of curses, voodoo, and devil worship.

Anyway, back then a certain faction of Red Sox fans reveled in making accusations of their rivals, there was the emerging thought that the Yankees had cheated their way to a Game 7 ALCS win over Boston, thanks to the 3-home run contributions of one Jason Giambi. Early on in the following year, the slugging first baseman had apologized with a fill-in-the blank press conference. Nobody thought he had disobeyed any city water laws, but he never said the "S" word either.

Back then, we were still living in a naïve world of baseball in Boston. We were the lovable losers. The Yankees were the needle-pushing cheats. Back then it was easier to believe that they were the dark knight and we were the damsels in distress.

The Mitchell report of 2007 listed 120 MLB players as steroid users, many of them the nucleus of the Yankees mid to late 1990's dynasty years when they won 4 World Series titles. "Fucking cheaters" we bellowed, as if to make ourselves completely immune from the process. "Didn't see any Red Sox players listed" we were quick to say, and all seemed right in Camelot. Lancelot had finally become king, in both 2004 and 2007, which made it even sweeter that we did it "honestly".

Back then, you know...back then... we just assumed the good guys were the only ones not juicing, a belief not exactly disputed by the Mitchell Report, which delivered us such tasty revelations as ... Eric Gagne, who was here all of three months, and sucked mightily anyways. Meanwhile, Roger Clemens watched as his Hall of Fame career got taken down into a sewer of events, and once again, Red Sox fans enjoyed a nice bout with karma.

Yesterday though, the bombshell dropped when it was announced that Manny Ramirez -- that’s former Red Sox World Series MVP Manny Ramirez -- has been suspended by Major League Baseball for 50 games for using performance-enhancing drugs.

Camelot shook. The glass house that was Red Sox Nation was suddenly in full view of everyone, and the stones were soon to follow. That doesn’t mean he used them in ’04... Or in ’07...but now, we have some reason to believe he may have. And it bothers us.

You see, much like how all of New England grins over the tainted legacy of Alex Rodriguez, so too beginning today, is the resume of Manny Ramirez. And yes, if you think Giambi’s presence in 2003 was a dirty avenue to the World Series, then you have to think the same about Ramirez in ’04 and ’07.

Frankly, these admissions rarely surprise me anymore. I’m more intrigued these days to see how the public reaction develops. It ruined Clemens’ life. It sent Barry Bonds, Sammy Sosa and Mark McGuire into exile.

For the most part, Red Sox fans will revel in the news of another enemy of the state getting busted. But, as one person noted, “If Manny was using in 2009 when baseball was testing, what do you figure he was doing when baseball wasn’t testing?"

Way back then, we didn’t know any better. These days, we should, but something tells me that some of us are going to conveniently forget about Giambi and ’03. When that sort of thing hits close to home, you normally do. In any event. they don't take away MVPs or World Series titles.

Only the perception of them.

Unsung...and barely even spoken acapello

2009-05-06T21:09:00.005-04:00

Call them the unsung heroes of World War II. They didn't see combat, but they did fly 60 million miles in 60,000 hours across the U.S. and the European Theater. There were 1,074 trained and certified pilots in this group, and they flew dozens of missions - although non-combat missions - during the 1940's.

"We were not treated the same as combat tested pilots at that time, but we proved given the same training they were receiving, we could fly anything they flew on any mission they flew, except our missions weren't over Germany or Japan; mainly France, England, and North Africa after Rommel was driven out" one of their best pilots says.

They tested new aircraft and tested combat planes after repairs were made. They delivered planes, towed targets for antiaircraft gunnery practice, flew searchlight-tracking missions and simulated bombings. Some taught flight students while they were still cadets in training.

"It wasn't hard for me. I just did it even though I missed the opportunity for genuine combat, I was part of a force that did so much for the war effort, it didn't matter after a while" says Peterson Young, 86. "People talked about me, but they had to talk about somebody. Non-combatants were - and still are - looked down upon"

This particular group of pilots were not recognized for their efforts until 1977 when honored by then-President Carter, but they inspired other generations to climb to higher heights. They were America's unsung heroes...but they will not be forgotten.

I know I won't allow anyone to forget....

the women pilots of the WASP Corps.

David Koresh and the Temple of Doom

2009-05-05T16:11:00.004-04:00

Contrary to popular belief (as well as those who defend the 1990's presidency voraciously) the events of 9-11 are not, as one friend told me, past history, nor were the events of 9-11 the first attack on US soil since Pearl Harbor, no matter what Andrea Mitchell and Keith Olbermann would have you believe.

It was actually number 5. With apologies to all you who flunked elementary math, first Arab attack was the WTC in February of 1993, number three was the embassies in Africa, the fourth was the USS Cole, and the fifth....yes the fifth...1-2-3-4-5....was 9-11.

This is a partial story of number 2. Fasten your seat belts, and kids under 48 inches not allowed on this ride.

Zacarias Moussaoui, dubbed the "20th 9-11 hijacker" by federal prosecutors, would have been released from federal custody before the 9-11 attacks if not for the heroic persistence of field agents in the FBI’s Minneapolis office. Agent Coleen Rowley and members of her FBI team carried on a running fight with top FBI and Justice Department officials who tried to stop the Minnesota investigation and prevented a search of his laptop computer until after his fellow conspirators crashed their hijacked planes on September 11.

There are many important, unanswered questions concerning Moussaoui. For instance: Why have federal officials pointedly ignored publicly available facts showing that most of the $64,000 he received from Al-Qaeda/Al Qaeda Linked sources was spent in the Oklahoma City area, where he attended the Airman Flight School in nearby Norman. The largest chunk of Moussaoui’s funds, $35,000, was provided by al-Qaeda paymaster Yazid Sufaat, one of the principal hosts of the secret al-Qaeda planning meeting for 9-11 in Malaysia. Moussaoui, according to federal authorities, was operating under the direction of al-Qaeda mastermind Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, who met in the Philippines with his nephew, 1993 World Trade Center bomber Ramzi Yousef, during the same time period that Yousef was meeting with an American named Terry Nichols, also in the Philippines.

September 11 hijacker Ziad Jarrah’s ticket (United Airlines Flight 93) was purchased from a computer terminal at Oklahoma University in Norman. Moussaoui was a frequent visitor to the OU campus, worked out at the OU gym and recruited OU student Hussain Al-Attas. September 11 hijacker Mohammed Atta, a member of al-Qaeda’s cell in Hamburg, Germany, visited the same Norman, Oklahoma, flight school that Moussaoui attended.

Oklahoma, Oklahoma, Oklahoma...over and again. Strange place for a former African American turned Muslim zealot to hang out, don't you think?

Perhaps the most important "coincidence" concerning Moussaoui is his connection to convicted felon Melvin Lattimore, a convert to Islam who now goes by the name Majahid Abdulquaadir Menepta.

Lattimore/Menepta’s credit card was used to help finance the 1993 World Trade Center bombing directed by Ramzi Yousef.

Federal ATF Agent Jeffrey Whitney has testified in court that one day after the Oklahoma City bombing, an FBI informant told FBI superiors that Menepta should be considered a top suspect in the Oklahoma attack.

Several employees at Travelers Aid, one block from the Murrah Building, identified Menepta as entering the Travelers Aid office with three other men the day before the Oklahoma City bombing. Two of the men accompanying Menepta were identified as closely resembling associates of an American named Timothy McVeigh, and one of the witnesses positively identified the vehicle that the group drove away in as Mr. McVeigh’s beat-up Mercury Marquis.

Menepta was a member of a militant mosque in St. Louis and is now a member of a radical mosque in Norman, where he says he saw Moussaoui on a daily basis. According to Oklahoma news accounts, Menepta and Moussaoui were roommates in Norman, while Moussaoui attended flight school.

Menepta’s roommate, Al-Attas, drove Moussaoui from Oklahoma to Minnesota to begin flight school there. When Al-Attas was arrested, Menepta drove to Minnesota and posted $5,000 bail for his release.

When Menepta and Al-Attas returned to Norman on August 21, 2001, more than three weeks before 9-11, agents from the Oklahoma City FBI office knocked on their apartment door. According to the agents, several men fled the apartment and exited the building before the agents could react. Also, according to FBI documents, 9-11 hijacker Salem Al-Hazmi was seen in Menepta’s Norman apartment in April 2001.

Menepta was arrested one month after the 9-11 attacks as a material witness and possible co-conspirator. Menepta vigorously defended Moussaoui as a "scapegoat."

Gloria Smith, who managed the office of a charitable organization called "The Travelers Aid Association"... one block from the Murrah Building in Oklahoma City, told FBI agents that Melvin Lattimore/Menepta came to her office with other men in Timothy McVeigh’s car. A federal ATF agent has testified in court that one day after the bombing an undercover informant fingered Menepta as the top suspect. Mrs. Smith, who has no desire for fame in this affair, nor does she have an agenda, swore under oath TEN TIMES she witnessed what she witnessed. But he was never arrested for shit.

The story goes on and on. The FBI "lost" the transcripts of Mrs. Smiths 10...that's correct...10 interviews. They lost all 10. There were other documents that pertained to material evidence that were lost or "misfiled" and therefore never came out as public information. What bad luck, huh? Gee... Whitewater and blowjobgate were going on during these times as well. No point in any loose ends or security messiness being brought up in the mid to late 90's. Nawwww.

So what we have is a discharged buck sergeant (three stripes) from the Army who had no apparent employment, hanging out with a farmer from Minnesotta who didn't farm, AND---ALL----BY---THEMSELVES---they had the financial wherewithal to buy all the materials needed to bring down a semi-sky scraper, take trips all over the US, take trips to the Philippines, rent all kinds of vehicles, stay at semi-expensive hotels, eat, and whatever else
they needed, but the administration of the 1990's would have us believe this was some angry white supremacist hell-bent on avenging some retard in Waco, Tx. C'mon...even the dumbest of you out there know "no ticky, no laundry", and as far as the records indicate, McVeigh and Nichols weren't buying on credit. Where was the ENORMOUS amounts of UNTRACEABLE CASH coming from?

Lastly, there is this business of total silence, and I mean TOTAL FUCKING SILENCE, even on his death gurney. If he did what he did for what they said he did, why wouldn't he proclaim it to the world, at least on the day he died? You pull a shitstorm and shove it right up the US Governments ass, and you don't want to claim it? You don't want to go on CNN and laugh? Intead...you die tight-lipped?

And speaking of dying, isn't the national average for death row something like 20+ years? It certainly isn't 4 years after a conviction...but it was here. My, my...that sure was fast. You would think someone in D.C. had sweaty palms or something.

You know what, I've concluded my research is full of shit. The broke Buck Sergeant and the non-farming farmer did it. It must have been an inheritance that no one has heard of.

Or...?

Authors note: If you don't understand the significance of the title, "David Korsh and the Temple of Doom"....go away.

Hi mom...we're number 25

2009-05-05T07:41:00.003-04:00

That's our number....25.

We here in the U.S. rank 25th in the world in adult literacy rate, and to be honest with you, I think it's a lie. We're more like 115th or something. Botswana is ranked higher than us. Bot-fucking-swana! The truth is, Botswanians probably know where the US is, but I can bet you most Americans have probably NOT heard of Botswana, let alone know where it is.

Thaaank it ain't troo pardner? Thaaank agin. The following are excerpts from comments on an Orlando news site on the Casey Anthony story, as they are...word for word:

Death penalty
I think she should suffer every minuet of her life. Never to whore around again or kill any body else.So I think no death penalty. Besides Florida is not a good place for death penalty..check out the statistics. With all the high priced lawyers they have and more every day, who knows? But then, of course, Phil Spector got found guilty after the second trial...Good riddence
By Pauline @ 04/27/09 08:59:15 PMreport

Death for Caysee
I have watched this caes from day one and I personally think she should not get death because it is an easy way out for her put her sorry as in prison with photo's of that precious angel so she never forgets what she did and no partying and no booze and lovers that would be the best punishment for her. Her parents are no better than she is yes I agree it's there daughter and she deserves there love but who is there for Caylee?? The public cares more about that child than her own grandparents and I think they also should go to jail for being liars and trying to get her off..I pray they see that angels face everytime they close there eyes. May god have mercy on there souls because the world knows there scum like they say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree she got it from her momma..
By Cindy Lamb @ 04/27/09 07:13:34 AM

Who to
I said to what for one that Casie and er mother Cindee should have burned for there comments and acshions wile that baby slept in the woods. Same on them for there belefs.
By John @ 04/2/09 06:14:29 AM

Those are just a small sampling of the grammatically and spelling impaired idiots who live in this country. About 20 years ago I read an article in US News and World report that stated 70% of Americans could not read, write, handle their checkbook, etc. to the educational level they had sheepskin for. In other words, a college grad was akin to a senior in high school, and a high school grad was like an 8th grader, and so on. I think that percentage has risen exponentially.

I rest my case. Americans are a stupid fucking lot.

115th at best.

Pay no attention to the man behind that veiled curtain...

2009-05-04T16:22:00.002-04:00

"I don't know about you but I'd rather be around an honest sinner than a phony Christian any day. To be honest with you, I don't like faux anything. I have almost no tolerance for liars in general and even less for lying so-called Christians. Lies are not compassionate - they are cowardly, crooked and void of any confidence in God or anyone else and have been at the heart of every wicked act since Eve took of the forbidden fruit."

That passage was written by a man named Paul Proctor, and I couldn't agree more.

I work with two phony Christians, and they piss me off on a regular basis. They bring their Bibles to work, youtube sermons to watch at work, and never use cuss words. Meanwhile they pull Casey Anthony's on their fellow employees almost daily. They metaphorically lock them in the trunk while they go about partying, then sometime later, they double bag them and dump them in the woods nearby.

But they don't cuss...and they read their Bibles. Apparently they conveniently skip over James 2:14-18 where he says "I do not object to faith; I object to faith unaccompanied by action".

And that is what most faux religious people get wrong, and they think the rest of us don't notice. Their actions do not mirror their stated beliefs. This is in fact not limited to Christianity alone, it's just easier to point out to Americans in their most common religious orientation.

Muslims who go to the Mosque and pray are not bad people. Muslims who willingly plan to fly planes into large buildings in the name of Allah are. Hebrews who go to the wailing wall while living a normal life are fine by me...it's the ones who start shit in Gaza - knowing it will escalate and cause death and destruction - they're the people we all have to watch out for. The biggest, yes I said BIGGEST, problem in the world today is not faith, it is organized religion and the flawed human beings who practice it.

Don't believe me?

Catholics are brought up in fear...driven by the Mother of all Guantanamo's...the mortal sin. If you do this, it's that kind of sin and your teeth will rot by age 16. If you do that, Locusts will fly up your ass and implode you by age 40. But the mortal sin....ohhhh....fear the mortal sin at all costs. That one is reserved for kids who talk back to their mothers or get a C- in Chemistry. A mortal sin means you're off to hell doomed to forever spend your eternal life in flames and soot. It is designed to make you welcome the Locust-Ass-Implosion, and forever seek counselling for you're imperfect thoughts and deeds...from a Priest...look out if you're a teenage boy. Awwww...didn't like that crack? Prove it isn't true. Go ahead, I'm waiting. Love thy neighbor as thyself evidently means giving blowjobs to altar boys.

The point here is I've known about 4 people in my life that were truly Christian...and you'd never know it. They don't drag the Bible around on a leash...when they hit their finger with a hammer they yell FUCK!!!...and they don't try to recruit you or fill your head with how great and holy they are. These four people I know...get this....they LIVE IT. They're kind, considerate, happy, hard-working, they believe that a broken finger will not be healed by God, rather God placed doctor's on the earth to help them splint the fracture, and they cuss now and then. And screw unashamedly. And occasionally shoot the bull just for fun.

But they are never...ever...ever...faux. Now take that and put it in your sacrificial wine and drink it.

American Idolotry

2009-05-04T07:23:00.004-04:00

He works in Washington, D.C. and he is a paid employee of the United States of America, yet I constantly see him on !E, "Inside Edition", and other celebrity tv shows. Why?

He's not a celebrity, he's the leader of the Western World for Christ's sake...and he has problems. Some of them inherited...some of them self-inflicted, but I'm not going there, nor do I care to. Everyone is soooo in love with him, any critique would fall upon deaf ears anyway.

Please spare me the Survivor/American Karoke attachment to this guy, and that includes his wife Michelle and two daughters Nonique and Monique. Get him off the pages of US magazine and into the business of US...as in US the U.S.....US the overly taxed....US the unemployed...US the far too litigated, and US the target of Mexiswine influenza.

The next time I see this guy, he damn well better be doing something other than apologizing to the Japanese for bombing US.

Now shut the hell up already!

60 Minutes

2009-05-03T20:11:00.004-04:00

Unfortunately, I'm nearly 52 years old, and I've only known what a Republican and a Democrat...a conservative and a liberal is.....for about 12 years or so. In fairness to me - a lifelong soldier - it didn't really matter. A Democrat was someone who raised my pay, but let anyone with a pulse into the service, making my life a living nightmare while simultaneously financially comfortable, and a Republican was someone who cared little for huge pay advances, but was intensely keen on retirement benefits and combat preparedness, particularly with attention to the types of individuals joining the service. They both had they're positives and negatives, but either way - I had to live with it.

Television...and 60 Minutes... has been there all along.

Given the fact that I knew nothing my entire life, I neither knew nor did I care about the politics of television, especially television news. "Who fucking cared?", was my philosophy, and it suited me fine. But there was something about "60 Minutes"...something covert and hidden to me. I never trusted the so-called "journalism", even when I was young, stupid, and uncaring.

I still don't. "60 Minutes" is full of shit, and I don't even have to watch it to know that.

If you do watch it...fine. I don't fucking care...I'm not you.

Post #1 of "An Impacted Truth". 3 May 2009.

"Milk" et al

2009-05-03T12:34:00.008-04:00

I rented and saw the movie "Milk" about the rise of gay activist and politician Harvey Milk in San Francisco, and I thought to myself, "Wow. A gay man rising to political fame and power in San Francisco. Whoda thunk it possible? What a powerful story!"

Then I did some research on my world-wide internetting machine and found another interesting story that I thought should be made into a T.V. movie, at the very least a Lifetime movie staring John Stamos and co-starring Christie McNichol:

"Hamilton"

It's the implausible story of Ward Hamiltion III, a white man trying and succeeding in the complex world of politics that is impoverished - and 97% African-American - Aspen Colorado.
He soon becomes the mayor, championing such fantastic causes as "ASPRM", the American Society for the Protection of Runway Models, and "KSSFCF", Keep the Ski Slopes for the Caucausian Folk. This inspirational story - carved out of the burrows and bowery's of Southhampton, Long Island - will thrill and inspire tens of thousands of non-minority children attempting to live on less than $1.6 M dollars a year to reach out, find their inner strength, and to achieve what was otherwise thought to be unachievable: a quality life with limited maid and butler service.

As I type this, tears are forming in my eyes now. God Bless Harvey Milk and Ward Hamilton. Without their sacrifices to overcome incredibly long odds, there would be no good bath houses on the Northern California coast, and nothing but cheap $550 a night hotels in the ghetto-ized mean streets of Aspen.

I'm sorry. I have to stop typing now, the saline is screwing up my keyboard.

Authors Note: Harvey Milk is veru real,but the character "Ward Hamilton III" is completely ficticious, and if you Googled him, thinking he waz real, you're a douche-bag, and you deserve your shame and embarrassmennt for being so stupid.

My language

2009-05-01T17:01:00.002-04:00

Some would say I am vulgar, others uncouthe. Me? I just say I'm fucking free to say whatever-the-fuck I want to.

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language is the word fuck. It is the one and only word which can describe pain, pleasure, hate, love, confusion, happiness, sadness, and dismay.

Fuck falls into many grammatical categories. It can be used as a verb, both transitive (Bill fucked Sherrie) and intransitive (Sherrie was fucked by Bill). It can be an active verb (John really gives a fuck about his weight) or a passive verb (Mary really doesn’t give a fuck how fat she gets), an adverb (Sandra is fucking interested in Tom), and a noun (Rhett is a dumb fuck). It can be used as an adjective (Elaine is fucking beautiful), and as a hyphenated addition to a word (Un-fucking-believable).

It should be obvious now that there are not many words in the English language with the versitility and obvious power of the word fuck.

Besides the sexual connotations, this lovely word can be used to describe many types of situations we find ourselves in on a daliy basis:

Insurance claims: I got fucked by my agent.

Happiness: I got fucked by my girlfriend.

Sadness: I got fucked by my girlfriend.

Dismay: Whaaaat the fuck?.

Frustration: Fuck.

Amazement: Well, fuuuuuck.

Trouble: I guess I’m fucked now.

Aggression: Fuck you.

Passive: Fuck me.

Anger: Fuck it.

Confusion: What the fuck is going on?

Difficulty: I can’t understand this fucking tax form.

Curiosity: What the fuck are you doing?

Despair: I'm fucked again.

Uncaring: Who gives a fuck?

Religious: Holy fuckin' shit!

Incompetence: He’s all fucked up.

Laziness: He’s just fucking around.

Rebellion: Fuck off.

Fear: Oh fuck.

Displeasure: What the fuck is happening to me?

It can be used in descriptive anatomy: He’s a fucking asshole.

It can be used to suggest ideas: Go fuck yourself.

It can be used to tell time: It’s Five-fucking-thirty and I'm stuck in traffic again.

It can be used in business: How did I end up with this fucking job?

It can have maternal connections: Motherfucker.

It can be nautical: Fuck the Navy.

It can be political: Fuck the governor.

It can be medical: He's fucking retarded.

It can enhance the meaning of a word: Abso-fucking-lutely.

The mind boggles at the many creative uses of the word fuck. How could anyone be offended by the word fuck? That's why it's a staple of my dailly speach and a new feature on my blog.

You don't like it, you say? Fuck you.

The Serbian Diet

2009-04-30T18:06:00.004-04:00

BELGRADE (Reuters) – A Serbian union official who chopped off his finger and ate it in a protest over wages that in some cases have not been paid in years, said Monday he did it to show how desperate he and other workers were.
"We, the workers have nothing to eat, we had to seek some sort of alternative food and I gave them an example," Zoran Bulatovic told Reuters. "It hurt like hell."

It hurt like hell? No shit? Which part...the chopping of the finger...the swallowing of his own finger...or the ass kicking his wife gave him for being so fucking stupid? You know what they say: "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." In this case though, it might be adviseable to trust your own judgement. Besides, who the hell gives a shit what Romans do?

In other news, "Porky's Pandemic" has reached emergency stages, which on the homeland security color meter is......uuuuuuuummmm....I have no friggin' idea. Let's call it fuschia.

Just for shits and giggles, the following headlines were ripped from newspapers across the country in the last week:

TWO RUSSIAN SHIPS COLLIDE, ONE DIES

KILLER SENTENCED TO DIE FOR SECOND TIME IN 3 YEARS

WAR DIMS HOPES FOR PEACE

JUVENILE COURT TO TRY SHOOTING DEFENDANT

Bdabee bdabee bdabee dats all folks

And While I'm at it

2009-04-29T19:17:00.002-04:00

If you are a U.S. Service man or woman, or a former U.S. service man or woman who served in the Middle East since 1990, you hereby have complete authorization to take a 36" long, 32 oz Lousville Slugger wooden baseball bat and beat the livin' shit out of any doctor, lawyer, or government official who tells you Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome and Gulf War Syndrome are not real. Legally.

And speaking of that, any American who doesn't kneel down and kiss the ring of any military man or woman, any honest police officer, or any firefighter or nurse, you are hereby on notice that they may also take the same baseball bat and beat the fuck out of you without any chance of legal issues or problems.

'Nuff said.

Are you a D an R or an I? And who gives a shit anyways?

2009-04-29T17:51:00.001-04:00

Senator Arlen Specter (R) Pennsylvania, recently declared that he was no longer going to be a Republican, and he would soon be changing to a Democrat. He's going from a R to a D, and the truth of the matter is he's really a D-I-C-K.

C'mon. Who gives a fuck?

He said two things that struck me...first of all, he said he now believes in the democratic ideals more than the far right that the leadership of the republican party is spouting. Now to be honest, that may be true...PARTLY. The real reason more than likely is he has evaluated his chances of reelection this fall and poll data has shown that his ancient ass is gonna get kicked like Mike Tyson vs. Mickey Rooney.

Democratic ideals my ass! He has no chance of staying in his job, so he's taking steps to ensure he does. As with ALL politicians, you can tell they are lying by watching their lips move. The second thing he said was the President was going to campaign for him.

The president. Of the United States. Is going to campaign for him. What? A bleeding economy, swine flu, war and Al Quaeda aren't enough to keep the President busy? For the record, I am now going to offer the solution to most of our problems.

1) Term limits. PERIOD! How come every elected official in this country has term limits except the House and Senate? Because the House and Senate make the fucking rules, that's why. Here's my suggested rule. Two terms and your ass is back in the law office suing McDonalds for being stupid enough to serve hot coffee to people who want.....uuuuummmm....HOT COFFEE.

2) Governors and the President cannot campaign for anyone, anytime, anywhere. Get to work assholes, and stop fucking shit up.

3) No more D, R, or I. From now on, it's Mr Smith vs. Mrs. Jones. Mrs. Jones believes in this, Mr. Smith believes in that...screw party affiliation. I don't agree with abortion, but I also don't get involved in telling others what is right and wrong. I don't own a gun, but I believe in the 2nd amendment. What the hell does that make me? Parties are hereby disolved by my order. No more Independent-Demofucklicans!

4) Get a fucking job. If you're 23, healthy, and all you want to do is sit on your couch watching the Price is Right while drawing a federal subsidy, you're done. Go clean some toilets or do one of those jobs "Americans won't do". Either that or get the hell out. Now.

5) No more parties - no more lobbyists. Anyone who claims to be a lobbyist or does lobbyist activites will immediately be sent to Af-fuckin-ghanistan to perform human shield duty.

6) No pork projects. You need a new bridge? Ask for one. You fraudulently sequester taxpayer money without being forthright, you're going to human shield duty with the Abramoff's.

7) A national sales tax, and with that a flat tax. Does that make me a Libertarian? Not any more. Liberrepublifucks are not allowed in the United States of JL4.

That's it...in less than a year we'd be sitting once again on top. And speaking of that, all this lame assed bullshit about appologizing for being the biggest, baddest, m-effer on the block? I LIKED IT when we were the toughest country out there. Too bad if Syria is a shit-hole. None of my kids are Syrian, so I don't care. And in closing, I think people who use the word "FUCK" in creative ways should be paid for it.

Peace.

***** flu

2009-04-28T17:38:00.002-04:00

Israeli official: Swine flu name offensive
1 day ago
JERUSALEM (AP) — The outbreak of swine flu should be renamed "Mexican" influenza in deference to Muslim and Jewish sensitivities over pork, said an Israeli health official Monday.
Deputy Health Minister Yakov Litzman said the reference to pigs is offensive to both religions and "we should call this Mexican flu and not swine flu," he told a news conference at a hospital in central Israel.
Both Judaism and Islam consider pigs unclean and forbid the eating of pork products.

I'm on board with this one for sure. These kind, wholesome people should not be thouroughly insulted by naming a flu after a dirty disgusting beast. To think that we would even think of offending our car-bombing, airline-hijacking, child-murdering, terrorist-fuck Arab friends is disgusting to me. By all means, show a little kindness to the Al Quaeda harboring IED building punks, they're people too.

From now on, let's just call it "Porky's Pandemic", and leave the poor desert people alone to fuck their camels and take their yearly baths.

BNL The Old Apartment

2009-04-18T12:59:00.001-04:00

Broke into the old apartment
This is where we used to live
Broken glass, broke and hungry
Broken hearts and broken bones
This is where we used to live

Why did you paint the walls?
Why did you clean the floor?
Why did you plaster over the hole I punched in the door?
This is where we used to live

Why did you keep the mousetrap?
Why did you keep the dishrack?
These things used to be mine
I guess they still are, I want them back

Broke into the old apartment
Forty-two stairs from the street
Crooked landing, crooked landlord
Narrow laneway filled with crooks.
This is where we used to live.

Why did they pave the lawn?
Why did they change the locks?
Why did I have to break it, I only came here to talk
This is where we used to live

How is the neighbor downstairs?
How is her temper this year?
I turned up your tv and stomped on the floor just for fun
I know we dont live here anymore
We bought an old house on the danforth
She loves me and her body keeps me warm
Im happy here
But this is where we used to live

Broke into the old apartment
Tore the phone out of the wall
Only memories, fading memories
Blending into dull tableaux

I want them back
I want them back

Barenaked Ladies-Brian Wilson

2009-04-18T12:52:00.001-04:00

Drove downtown in the rain nine-thirty on a Tuesday night,
just to check out the late-night record shop.
Call it impulsive, call it compulsive, call it insane,
but when I'm surrounded I just can't stop.

It's a matter of instinct, it's a matter of conditioning,
it's a matter of fact.
You can call me Pavlov's dog.
Ring a bell and I'll salivate. How'd you like that?
Dr. Landy tell me you're not just a pedagogue,
cause right now I'm

Lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did
Well I'm lying in bed just like Brian Wilson did.

So I'm lying here, just staring at the ceiling tiles.
and I'm thinking about what to think about.
Just listening and relistening to Smiley Smile,
and I'm wondering if this is some kind of creative drought
because I am

And if you want to find me I'll be out in the sandbox,
wondering where the hell all the love has gone.
Playing my guitar and building castles in the sun,
and singing "Fun, Fun, Fun."

I had a dream that I was three hundred pounds
and though I was very heavy,
I floated 'til I couldn't see the ground
I floated 'til I could not see the ground
Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
Somebody help me, I couldn't see the ground
Somebody help me because I'm

Drove downtown in the rain nine-thirty on a Tuesday night.
Just to check out the late-night record shop.
Call it impulsive, call it compulsive, call it insane;
but when I'm surrounded I just can't stop.

2009-04-11T18:44:00.001-04:00

Throw it all away
Let's lose our selves
'cause there's no one left for us to blame
It's a shame, we're all dying
And do you think you deserve your freedom?

How could you send us so far away from home?
When you know damn well that this is wrong
I would still lay down my life for you

And do you think you deserve your freedom¿
No, I don't think you do

There's no justice in the world

There's no justice in the world

And there never was

2009-04-04T18:41:00.001-04:00

2009-04-04T18:40:00.001-04:00

2009-04-04T18:39:00.001-04:00

Every April 1st,I can't help thinking of October...especially the most fantastic October of my life: 2004.

2009-04-01T19:41:00.001-04:00

The difference, Part I

2009-03-25T20:13:00.001-04:00

The difference Part II

2009-03-25T20:12:00.001-04:00

2009-03-17T18:32:00.002-04:00

I feel you there in times of need,
I notice when you've left.
Your sage advice I always heed,
Your touch so soft and deft.

When I cruise with life on hold,
The caring absent and gone.
You temper my actions however bold,
You're never off - just on.

I've never asked for your assist,
Never plead for more.
My insticts tell me you exist,
Millions in your corps.

I thank you often and have for years,
I've never heard a no.
You just step in and ease my fears,
you watch out down below.

I've never seen you at close range,
But of course I know you're there.
You are in fact my Guardian Ange,
Part rumor, part fact, all prayer.

So stay with me, I need you now,
More than else before.
In you I place my furrowed brow,
In me you have a chore.

Guide me into softer fields,
Your hands warm and tender.
Take me if you cannot yield,
A made for life surrender.

I finish with a sound reply,
A message to my guard.
Thanks for all the endless supply,
We both know it's been hard.

- An appreciative JL4

Of who we are and what we're made of. (Subtitled: The baseball story that has nothing to do with baseball)

2009-03-12T19:21:00.003-04:00

Years and years and years ago, I was watching a Yankees vs Red Sox game on T.V. My then 2 year old son came into the room and declared, "Daddy watching baseball!!!". Proud and only able to barely contain my enthusiasm, my wide-eyed boy asked me the eternal 2 year old question:

"Why?"

"Because I like it", was my immediate reply. "Why?" he countered. I sat back and fell into that time warp where real time passes in mere seconds, but your mind's time scans the past lazily; at its own leisure.

At first I thought of answering his question with the story of the small town in the Berkshires of Western Massachusetts where I grew up. A town that had a maximum population of 6,000, and even with such a minuscule population in the lost and sleepy region of mountainous Mass, this town had produced Mark Belanger, 17 year major league veteran, with 5 World Series wins while playing short stop next to Brooks Robinson with the Baltimore Orioles. I could have told my son about Tommy Grieve, 2nd baseman for the Texas Rangers who eventually left baseball with a devastating injury to become the General Manager of those same Rangers. I might have even mentioned daddy's boyhood friends, Jeff Reordan and Dan Duquette, Reordan winning two World Series with the Minnesota Twins while known as "The Terminator", and Duquette being the General Manager of the Montreal Expos and the Boston Red Sox, his boyhood dream fulfilled.

I could have talked of my parents house, a traditional New England Colonial made out of Beech,Birch, Maple, Pine and Oak. Daddy could tell you about the day Grampa poured cement for steps leading up to the porch - big stuff in those days - and how daddy learned to throw and catch by tossing a rubber ball against those steps and working on his accuracy and fielding skills in the process. Fielding skills? Yes, of course. Daddy could throw the ball against certain parts of those steps to produce ground balls, line drives, and over-the-head fly balls that daddy could dive for and learn to catch major league style. Hour after hour, day after day.

As my son waited for my answer, I wandered off again. Should I tell him when all the dad's in the neighborhood got together and made the ballfield behind the grammar school, the one with the cinder block dugouts? Real dugouts!! Like the Red Sox had at Fenway. Daddy decided it best to leave out the fact that 35 years later, daddy returned to find that ball field done under for swing sets and jungle gyms, those beautiful dugouts only a vast, distant memory.

Nahhhh...too depressing for a 2 year old.

Perhaps it would be better to tell him about baseballs unmistakable smells. Yes.. the smell of the leather of that glove. You could also smell the oil used to soften it, the spit used to make a kid feel like a real major leaguer, and you could sense in that smell the love and the inspiration behind every practice; every ball thrown against those steps producing the fabulous catches in front of an invisible fan base of thousands; and you could sense above all else the effort, the tears, and the aches and pains borne of the love of a game that can only be explained by those that take the time to experience it; true love that makes athletic effort and achievement what it is - special in ways that cannot be quantified.

I don't know...maybe I could tell him about my first trip to Fenway park in the mid-1960's, and HOW OLD Fenway was even back then - 43 years ago. I'm sure I would have told him about the color green everywhere, from each level and every wall, to include the monstrosity in left field.
How bigger than life the players looked, and how radio was our TV back then, a practice (listening to ball games on the radio) I still do whenever possible today.

Oh, I thought to myself. I could tell him his dad was in Fenway Park on July 19th, 1969...the day man first landed on the moon, and how 35,000 people fell silent after the announcement over the PA system, and then a lone man stood up - and with one of those long stemmed plastic foghorn horns, proceeded to play the most beautiful version of "God Bless America" I'd ever heard to an absolutely dead silent and reverent stadium...

...Still to this day.

Yeah, daddy could have told him all of this and more, but daddy's boy was but two... at least several years from actual understanding, and several decades from true appreciation. I could have had Barney the purple dragon at first base and big bird at third, with the power rangers playing outfield, and it wouldn't have sunk in. So instead of wasting time elaborating on something incomprehensible to him at this time, I simply said to his one-word question "WHY?":
"Because it makes daddy happy"

And as then the 30 inch tall, 35 lb boy, snuggled underneath the crook of his daddy's arm to begin taking in his first ever ballgame, his daddy finished by saying to him:

"Especially when the Yankees lose."

JL4 Notes: As I reread this for clarity, my wife must have been chopping onions or something, because my eyes got all misty and stupid. Yeah...

- must be the onions.

My Immortal Acoustic

2009-03-08T20:10:00.001-04:00

WOW

Bob Dylan: I Shall Be Released: 1986

2009-03-07T11:51:00.001-05:00

Crossroads

2009-03-02T19:36:00.003-05:00

How much does one have to extend ones self to show that they care?

And if caring means having to hurt one who does not try in order to accommodate one who does, is that misplaced caring, or misguided loyalty?

I am in a predicament. I have to downsize my staff by two in order to keep business as usual for the other 12. I have to make my choice out of a field of 6 and pick four. My problem is, one of the six is a 10 inch thorn in my backside, but she is liked and subsequently fought for by at least one -and maybe a second - of the four that are definitely going to stay. I want to listen to the views of all I want to keep, and make those views and opinions count, but if I were to give in to the two that want me to keep my 10 inch thorn, I would have to give up a damn good person to do so. Why in hell would I trade away a 10 and keep a 1? Because of a loyalty to the 1 by two of the best workers I have?

Do I give up a 10 and absorb the pain of a 1 just to keep the two happy? This is my dilemma.

I want to dump the 1, keep the 10, and hope that the two quality people I have don't turn on me because I dropped their friend. I am trying to do this with all persons and situations in mind, but the fact that the 1 will more than likely always be a 1 leads me to the obvious:

Keep the 10...drop the 1. And hope the two I value and respect can do the same for me.

Crossroads...

Why?

2009-03-01T19:25:00.001-05:00

Miles From Nowhere

2009-03-01T19:12:00.001-05:00

U.S.S. Ticonderoga

2009-02-26T17:57:00.007-05:00

In my job I'm often in contact with people much older than myself, which means at age 51, these folks are REALLY old. Last Thursday afternoon, I ran into one of these guys. He was 85 years old and as sharp as a new sunrise. He knew I was a retired military man, and I asked him about this bag he had on the chair next to him, and he said that was a memento from the U.S. S. Ticonderoga.

It seems when this man was a mere 19 years old, he was smart enough and brave enough to be commissioned an officer in the U.S. Navy, sent to flight school, and taught to fly a "Hell Fighter" lightweight bombing plane that were docked on aircraft carriers in the South Pacific. He began to relate a story to me, and I found myself easing into that chair that formerly held the bag.

He spoke. I listened. Wordlessly. And I am now repeating this to you from memory. Memory tends to be good when one is impacted by the event.

I was impacted.

During the night of 9 January and 10 January, TF 38 steamed boldly through the Luzon Strait and then headed generally southwest, diagonally across the South China Sea. Ticonderoga provided combat air patrol coverage on the 11th and helped to bring down four enemy planes which attempted to snoop the formation. Otherwise, the carriers and their consorts proceeded unmolested to a point some 150 to 200 miles off the coast of Indochina. There, on the 12th, they launched their approximately 850 planes and made a series of anti-shipping sweeps during which they sank an incredible 44 ships, totaling over 130,000 tons. After recovering planes in the late afternoon, the carriers moved off to the northeast. Heavy weather hindered fueling operations on the 13th and 14th, and air searches failed to turn up any tempting targets. On the 15th, fighters swept Japanese airfields on the Chinese coast while the flattops headed for a position from which to strike Hong Kong. The following morning, they launched anti-shipping bombing raids and fighter sweeps of air installations. Weather prevented air operations on the 17th and again made fueling difficult. It worsened the next day and stopped replenishment operations altogether, so that they were not finally concluded until the 19th. The force then shaped a course generally northward to retransit Luzon Strait.

Admiral Halsey was known as a risk taker, and it was this fearless attitude that led Halsey to make the decision to attack the Japanese fleet with the carrier group that contained the Ticonderoga. The three task groups of Task Force 38 completed their transit during the night of 20 January and 21 January. The next morning, their planes hit airfields on Formosa, in the Pescadores, and at Sakishima Gunto. The good flying weather brought mixed blessings. While it allowed American flight operations to continue through the day, it also allowed for Japanese kamikaze operations.

Just after noon, a single-engine Japanese plane scored a hit on The Langley (a Destroyer) with a glide-bombing attack. Seconds later, a kamikaze swooped out of the clouds and plunged toward Ticonderoga. He crashed through her flight deck into the lower areas. One of those area's was the storage for ammunition, and abreast of the No. 2 5 inch (127 mm) mount, and his bomb exploded just above her hangar deck. Several planes stowed nearby erupted into flames. Death and destruction abounded, but the ship's company fought valiantly to save the threatened carrier.

My new found friend explained to me that there were three places a pilot could be on a carrier in 1944. In his bunk sleeping, in the ready room prepping for a mission, or in his plane in the hanger getting ready to fly. Many of my friends buddies were in those planes that exploded that day. He himself was with 13 other pilots in the ready room, only 57 feet starboard of the initial impact of the kamikaze. My then 19 year old friend was in a predicament. A large number of his friends were dead and he didn't know - but was prepared for the worst - he and the other 13
pilots were all simultaneously deaf from the explosions...one...after another...after another. He went on to say the sound mixed in with the minds ability to fantasize all things unimaginable was the most frightening thing. Having been there myself, my grunting was his acknowledgement that I full well knew what he meant. Besides the noise and the fear, they quickly became aware of the very real physical problem they had:

Fire.

Fire on a ship is like a flood in the desert. You would think the environment would be perfectly suited to handle both, but the truth is 100 miles the opposite. The pilots...deaf...are now coming to the realization at lightning speed that they are surrounded by fire in all compartments around the ready room, and where there is fire, there is smoke.

Thick. Black. Fuel-filled, burning steel smoke.

The only escape for these pilots was a gang-way, 450 feet to the aft of the ship. This gangway was 3 feet wide, totally enclosed like a large underground water pipe you would see at a large construction site, and it was filled with a combination 90% smoke, 10% fire. 19 years old, and this is your choice. He could stay and pray, or he could muster up he courage of an entire den of Lions, and in a crouch, make his way the 450 feet. The smoke was incapacitating, the the flames started their clothes on fire and burned their skin as they pushed on....panicked....blind....still mostly deaf from the concussions still occurring...and yet they pushed onward. 450 feet later, 9 of the 14 opened up a hatch above their heads, and got their first breath of air in minutes.

The other 5 never got out of the tube.

They never finished the 450 feet.

As my friend came up out of the hatch, he noticed for the first time that most of the skin on his right arm was gone, seared nearly to the bone by the dancing flames. He was coughing and spitting up a combination mucous and blood, but he was in fact - alive.

All of them split up to go find their aircraft - or IF they still had an aircraft. My friend told me he was standing up watching the Kamikaze's targeting successfully the other ships in the Task Force when a huge Marine Gunnery Sergeant yelled up at him from his perch behind this steel wall on the edge of the main turret area, "Hey Lieutenant, you like your head? If you don't move your dumb-ass down here right now, you won't fucking have one in about 20 seconds". My friend...knowing that a seasoned non-commissioned officer is almost always correct, did as he was told. He recanted to me that less than 5 seconds later, a spray of 20MM fire from a Japanese attack plane splattered the wall behind where he had just been standing with about 50 rounds in 3 seconds, and thank God in heaven for non-commissioned officers.

Wounded denizens of the deep often attract predators, and Ticonderoga was no exception. Other Kamikazes pounced on her like a school of sharks in a feeding frenzy. Her antiaircraft gunners struck back with desperate, but methodical, ferocity and quickly swatted three of her tormentors into the sea. A fourth plane slipped through her barrage and smashed into the carrier's starboard side near the island. His bomb set more planes on fire, riddled her flight deck, and injured or killed another 100 sailors, with Capt. Kiefer one of the wounded. Yet Ticonderoga’s crew refused to submit.

Capt. Kiefer conned his ship smartly. First, he changed course to keep the wind from fanning the blaze. Then, he ordered magazines and other compartments flooded to prevent further explosions and to correct a 10-degree starboard list. Finally, he instructed the damage control party to continue flooding compartments on Ticonderoga’s port side. That operation induced a 10-degree port list which neatly dumped the fire overboard. Firefighters and plane handlers completed the job by dousing the flames and jettisoning burning aircraft.

An then it was over. Two hours. 30 minutes of fighting followed by 90 minutes of survival. 218 men died that day, 436 were wounded. The Ticonderoga was out of the war forever.

It took over 30 minutes for my new friend to tell me his tale. He spoke eloquently, and with a memory that was as if it happened last Tuesday, not 65 years ago. I was in my uniform when this happened.

I stood up and he saluted me and said, "That's my report Captain. Permission to stand down." While hiding the tears that were seriously welling up in my eyes, I couldn't help but think that I have my life, my kids, my family, and my freedom because of this man, and he won't be with us too much longer. After he saluted and gave me his "report", my mind raced to find the words while my body tried to fight back the tears. All I could manage...all my eloquence and intellect notwithstanding...was a firm handshake and one word:

"Thanks".

Hell Fighter WWII

35 year old song. Still good to me

2009-02-22T06:32:00.001-05:00

2009 Grammy Awards

2009-02-15T16:07:00.001-05:00

Coming soon to a ballpark near you...

2009-02-12T06:06:00.002-05:00

Steroid freaks

2009-02-10T06:13:00.001-05:00

New Stuf- I"m In Love With A Girl - By Gavin DeGraw

2009-02-08T20:12:00.001-05:00

Flight UA-232 (Crash Landing at Sioux City) - 1/3 THE ORIGINAL HUDSON RIVER MIRACLE

2009-02-05T17:36:00.001-05:00

Flight UA-232 (Crash Landing at Sioux City) - 2/3 THE ORIGINAL HUDSON RIVER MIRACLE

2009-02-05T17:35:00.001-05:00

Flight UA-232 (Crash Landing at Sioux City) - 3/3 THE ORIGINAL HUDSON RIVER MIRACLE

2009-02-05T17:33:00.001-05:00

2009-02-04T12:30:00.004-05:00

Someone told me today they felt I was rude, condescending, negative, and abrupt. Naturally, I replied "Fuck you, you stupid ass." Then I walked away.

That isn't how I responded, that's a joke. I did however want to say that. Instead I used something professional like "I'm sorry you feel that way" or some such nonsense, when what I should have done was slap the crap outta him.

**SLAP**

Ever wanted to do that? Sure you have. You're in an elevator riding with another person. He silently farts as the door opens onto a new floor. He steps off as others are stepping on. Within seconds, they are exposed to the aroma that they can only believe YOU did. You wanna push the door open button, step out and find the guy and ...

**SLAP**

You're trying to get into traffic - which is going nowhere by the way - and you see your only opening closed by the woman who pretends to not see you. Out of the car, you want to knock on her window and ask "How's your day going dear?" ...

**SLAP**

Finally your in 7-Eleven to buy a coffee in the morning. You're not late for work, but time is of the essence. The fat dude in front of you is delighting in the $7 he won on a scratch ticket five minutes ago. While you're ichily waiting, he pulls out a 5 dollar bill to apply to the $7 he has in credit, and he starts agonizingly...painstakingly....slowthefuckingly...saying..."Uhhhh...gimme 2 lucky sevens, no no no, make that 3 crazy 8's, one lucky seven, uuuuhhhh, 3 casino hijix's, uhhhh, make that 4, and uuuuuhhhh, 3 monopoly's....how much is that?...$11?....okay.....and uuuuummmm...one three blind mice." Then he stands blocking the counter and starts scratching them right there. It's cab fare to get around his 300 lb frame, so you just put the coffee in the nearest place you can find and bolt out the door hoping like hell you don't get a speeding ticket while you worry about the time you've lost waiting for the sumo wrestler to piss away his 12 bucks.

**SLAP** **SLAP** **SLAP****SLAP**Fucking **SLAP****SLAP**

Sooooo....what does it for you? Or are you too happy in life to never want to **SLAP** anyone?

Attention K-Mart shoplifters

2009-02-02T18:21:00.003-05:00

I went shopping this past weekend for a suit coat. I went into Blookington's or whatever, and when I asked the nearly dressed like a hooker clerk at the perfume counter where the men's departmant was, she casually stopped sandpapering her nails long enough to give me a flick of her hand in the general direction of "over there asshole". I responded to this by leaving and finding another store. I went into the Binghamton coat factory, and needless to say, when the sales guy approached me, I was the proverbial blond chick at the mechanic’s…

Him- So, what are you looking for today?

Me- A jacket for semi-formal events and stuff.

Him- What style?

Me- uuuum…medium rare?

Him- …

Me- I have no idea. Show me some stuff and I’ll signal my approval by nodding my head.

Him- Do you like single or double breasted?

Me- Does it only go to two? Because I love breasts, so if there is a six breasted one, I’ll probably buy it.

Him- …

Me- Ok. I’m going to just go look around and see if I like anything. I obviously have no idea why I am even here…

Him- No, let me show you these. Some of the best looking blazers we have, in my opinion. *He showed me one*

Me- Yeah, that’s pretty swell. It’s about what I’m looking for. What do these things cost? *He shows me the price tag, which I am sure was a type-o.*

After regaining consciousness, I asked if I could see something a bit less like my mortgage payment and more like my insurance premium. He got a little “I’m better than you”, and said “well, that’s what blazers cost”. I said, “No they don’t, because my dad owned several, and he never had shit for money. If I told my dad I paid that much for any article of clothing that wasn’t charged with magical powers, he’d punch me in my face and disinherit me.”

It always kills me to see these flaky, arrogant diddlywops act like they are superior to me because they work in a clothing store and know more about fashion than a person like me - who couldn’t care less to be quite honest.

After I finally settled on a coat that wasn’t spectackulous in its expensitude, I went looking for a shirt. Different guy this time, but he showed me a nice $75 shirt that I scoffed at. That’s right, I scoffed. Scoffed because I was just at Ross and they had these things on sale. Nine of them for a dollar, and they came in a huge Ziploc bag.

Me- Seventy five dollars? (looking bewildered)

Him- Yeah, but you can tell everybody you paid $150 for it.

Me- Why would I do that? I don’t want my friends to think I am any dumber than they already do.

Him-...

Me-C 'mon, gimme a better reason

Him- Aww, come on, they’ll think you’re rich.

Me- I’d print my bank statement on a $2 tee shirt if I wanted my friends to laugh at my financial status. What do you have in the discount shirt bin?

Him-...

Genius

2009-01-31T16:45:00.010-05:00

The processes one goes through to arrive at a world changing idea is an amazing thing to behold.

As I watched the Shamwow infomercial for the 12th time last night, I arrived at a solution that will aid all of mankind. It was a process I went through to arrive at my moment of genius, and I am happy to relay it to you.

As I watched our guy here wrap a soaking wet sweater in a shamwow, seconds later amazed that the sweater was completely dry and wearable, my mind began to think of the possibilities.

Let's say the damn bursts, and the torrent of water is racing towards ma and pa's peanut farm. You could easily have a ready-made shamwow "net", much like the ones you see behind the goal posts at football games designed to entrap extra point and field goal kicks. The idea would be, as the raging wall of water, trees, concrete foundations, mud, and 1982 Cadillac DeVille's from the broken dam rushed down main street and headed to ma and pa's Circle M peanut patch, you raise the sham wow net up and as the water smashes into the net, it instantaneously disappears. The debris will naturally settle and stop moving as well. No more raging cascade...no flood...no lost peanuts. Shamwow would have diverted a disaster, and Peter Pan and Jiff were saved!

My brilliance was only beginning. Think of the day to day tasks we often find laborious. Need a pool drained? Drop a whole box of shamwow's in there, and within seconds it's as dry as a fart in a Texas windstorm. Tears at a funeral? Not after I invent and market the shamwow tearless eye patches (in dignified black of course, white for pre-September). That Lake holding up your strip-mall development plan? Not any more, as we employ the "EPA Buster", shamwows latest furrow into high finance without repercussions. Kind of like Wall Street without the messiness of bailout money.

My mind raced on. The biggest fear of Global Warming is the melting polar ice caps and the subsequent rising seas, right? I would make one-piece, two-piece, and even thong bikinis and male swim shorts out of shamwow material. We develop and give away 35,000 of these suits, have a national "Save the World So We Can All Say Wow Day" where 17,500 people enter both the Atlantic and Pacific ocean's at the same time, and faster than you can say...uhhhh... "WOW!"... the world's seas will have receded to pre-Jurassic levels! I could and probably would be in line for a Pulitzer for this one as soon as I calmed down PETA over those dead barracuda's and Squids.

While on this roll, I even came upon a marketing strategy for the suits. Years ago, most of you will know they developed a rain repellent material called "GoreTex". Our suits would be the anti-dryness suits, designed to cure the world of its largest ailment. Because it's global warming we are targeting, I thought we should call the suits...

AL GoreTex

Please...please. No applause necessary. Genius is best enjoyed in a low-key manner.

(P.S. There is of course, that pesky matter of 35,000 people sinking and drowning under the weight of their shamwow suits. I can't be bothered with such mundane details when I'm saving the world. You figure that one out; I can't be disturbed. I'm working on an idea for a solution to the energy crisis by deploying long-range tactical nuclear-tipped Pop Tarts. Intellectual flow must not be interrupted)

Go back....no, further....back...back...back. Surprised?

2009-01-30T18:04:00.001-05:00

New artist named Lesley Roy...pretty dam good, huh?

2009-01-29T18:29:00.001-05:00

Lest we ever forget...

2009-01-26T17:58:00.001-05:00

Youth. Yours, mine, theirs. Ours

2009-01-25T10:19:00.001-05:00

Father and Son

2009-01-24T19:56:00.001-05:00

2009-01-20T18:07:00.001-05:00

Dream Academy

2009-01-11T08:44:00.001-05:00

Dear JL4 (the herniated edition)

2009-01-08T20:09:00.004-05:00

Dear fuck asshole dick JL4,

I can't fuck shit ass stop bitch stop fucker dipshit even with asswipe medication.
What more fucker motherfucker can horseshit I fuck me do?

Tom in fucks dickhead shit Oklahoma

Dear Tom,

In my non-medical opinion, it appears to me you have your Tourettes under control, but like I said, I'm not a doctor.

JL4

Dear,

I have problems in completing and

Truly

Dear Truly,

Have you tried?

J

Dear JL4,

Years now for about dyslexia suffering I've been. Will ever ? when end it

In correspondence yours,

Illinois Bill from

Dill bear,

Doctors you that recommend surgery they where eyes switch left becomes that right verse visa and.

L4J

Read first - then listen

2009-01-07T21:25:00.001-05:00

There are times - admittedly not often - when I'll listen and actually appreciate a country song. The song must contain originality, a little rock and roll, have lyrics that sound as if they're written by an adult as opposed to a 5th grader, and the terms "mama", "daddy", and "mah dawg" are found nowhere in the song, it has a chance in my book. This is one of two that fit into that category.

Dear JL4

2009-01-06T18:18:00.002-05:00

Dear JL4 -

I have a major problem. I've been making the same recipes for 20 years..and I have run out of ideas. What should I make for dinner tonight???

Please advise

Helpless and hungry in Hollywood

Dear Helpless,

My good friend Barbie S. makes a great homemade dish she calls "Be gentle Yentl, it's only Lentil" soup. You take a half pound of lean matzo balls, marinated in olive oil and dead sea salts, and mix in a good amount of turnip greens, dates, and schmaltz. After cooking at a slow burn for...oh...40 minutes and 40 seconds...you split the mixture in two using a little known kitchen gadget called a "heston staff", and serve with a side unleavened bread and 3 fishes. Serves 5000.

BON APPETITE!

JL4

Dear JL4

2009-01-05T16:38:00.002-05:00

Dear JL4,

I have a problem. As a fully emancipated, forward-thinking feminist, I have recently been a stay at home mom, and to be honest I enjoyed it. Am I wrong?

Sincerely,

Guilty in Georgia

Dear Guilty,

Of course you're wrong! There's no such thing as a forward-thinking feminist.

JL4

Dear JL4,

I am a 24 year old male who has never been intimate with a woman before. I've been enjoying a loving but platonic relationship for nearly 6 months now. The other night on the sofa, things got hot and heavy, and she told me she had either TB or VD, but in my passion, I couldn't remember which. What should I do?

Yours Truly,
Confused in Connecticut

Dear Confused,

Unless she's coughing profusely, take a pass on this one.

JL4

Dear JL4,

Wooowwww. Do you know everything there is to know in the world?

Gushingly,
Impressed in Iowa

Dear Impressed,

Actually there are 3 and quite possibly 4 things I don't know.

JL4

Running on faith

2009-01-04T19:29:00.001-05:00

Lifehouse - Broken

2009-01-02T19:53:00.001-05:00

More good modern stuff

Gavin Rossdale - Love Remains The Same

2009-01-02T19:49:00.001-05:00

Good stuff from someone new on the block.

In case you care

2009-01-01T18:04:00.003-05:00

The list of bannished words is out from 2008 for 2009:

green I guess your new car will be called "Forrest"
carbon footprint or carbon offsetting Didn't know or care what this was
maverick The tv show or the type of horse?
first dude Never heard it
bailout I guess when you exit the canoe just before it goes over the falls it's....?
Wall Street/Main Street Shithouse/Outhouse?
monkey Okaaaaay. Is it now a cat?
emoticon WTF? :-)
icon or iconic Computer will promt you saying, "you have unused thingys on your desktop"
game changer What?
staycation This is clearly white yuppy crapolla
desperate search Oh Noooooo. Nancy Grace. What will you lead with?
not so much I killed this 2 years ago
winner of five nominations Yeah. Nominated is not winning
it's that time of year again Really? Same date and all?

Fortunately for us sane folks, shit-bird, shit-head, shit-for-brains, shit-eating grin, no shit, I can't take this shit, I love this shit, what the hell is this shit?, I don't believe this shit, is this the only shit on tonight?, give a shit, take a shit, good shit, bad shit, I've seen that shit, did you hear that shit?, don't gimme that shit, ya gotta be shitting me, ever been through some shit like that before?, shit happens, pack your shit and leave, some of the worst shit I've ever witnessed, holy shit, this shit is great, this shit sucks, dare ya to try that shit again, and of course - fuck this shit - are still not considered banned.

Happy New Year. I'm done with this shit for now.

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas. I saved the best for last. Merry Christmas and love from me

2008-12-25T17:47:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, When children sing all the world is good

2008-12-25T17:45:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas - Saving the good stuff for the end. When children sing, the world comes alive

2008-12-25T17:42:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 27, Part I

2008-12-24T16:24:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 27 Part II

2008-12-24T16:23:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, day 26

2008-12-23T15:51:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 25

2008-12-22T15:52:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 23

2008-12-20T17:45:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 21

2008-12-17T18:23:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 18 (Sorry...been gone)

2008-12-14T19:14:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 18 (Sorry...been gone)

2008-12-14T19:13:00.003-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 18 (Sorry...been gone)

2008-12-14T19:13:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 13

2008-12-09T21:41:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas (Special Edition part I)

2008-12-08T19:59:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Special Edition Part II

2008-12-08T19:58:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 12 (What its NOT about)

2008-12-08T17:43:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 12 (What the real deal is part2)

2008-12-08T17:42:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days if Christmas, Day 12 (What the real deal is Part 3)

2008-12-08T17:28:00.001-05:00

The 28 Days of Christmas

2008-12-07T19:50:00.003-05:00

We're not quite halfway through the 28 days of Christmas, for which I intend the 28th day to be December 24th, Christmas Eve. I think Christmas Eve is the early extension of Christmas Day, and therefore part and parcel the same thing.

I have hoped to bring forth some music not normally heard on the radio...and I think I've done quite nicely so far. While mixing in the modern rock sounds of Christian music's "Third Day", I have found a healthy mix of old-time music sung by its masters as well as by some artists you had no idea sung these songs; Sarah McLaughlin, The Beatles, and U2 spring to mind. Who knew the Beatles sang "White Christmas"?

It's always a good idea to add some humor to the affair, as evidenced by the video clips from "Christmas Vacation" and the audio nightmare of the poor bastard butchering "O Holy Night" (sorry Karen...I love that song too). Stay tuned for more from artists such as Stevie Nicks, Bob Seger, and some others who may surprise you.

Hope you like, and Merry Christmas, peace, love, and fellowship to all.

-JL4

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (the WOW edition part 1)

2008-12-07T16:49:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (the WOW edition part 2)

2008-12-07T16:48:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (the WOW edition part 3)

2008-12-07T16:47:00.001-05:00

This has nothing to do with Christmas. I just needed to hear a sad song today, and no, I'm not telling you why

2008-12-07T16:14:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (no words needed part 1)

2008-12-07T10:53:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (no words needed, part 2)

2008-12-07T10:50:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 11 (no words needed, Part 3)

2008-12-07T10:47:00.001-05:00

JL4's 28 Days of Christmas, Day 10. When Christmas took a nose dive to awful-land, part 1

2008-12-06T17:13:00.001-05:00