Famous 9-1-1 calls

"Uh hello, 9-1-1, this is Casey Anthony. I'd like a Hawaiian Pizza... Oh Snap! I mean, my daughter, Caylee, she's like been missing, for like, 31 days, and like I'm sooooo bummed, you know. Like out of my freakin' mind, that, like I think, I like left her with this babysitter, Zabmida-Dakinda Lopez...or maybe it was Frederica-Umatilla Gamez. No, no...wait...it's...it's...Zackmeela-Hernandez Dominguez...."
"Oh forget it, could you just bring me the pizza? Call Lee and Cindy to get the scoop on that other shit about the kid..they can tell you about it."

"Is this 9-1-1? It is? Good. This is General George A Custer up in Sioux City S.D., and I shit you not- there are a butt-load of Indians comin' this way, and I don't think there's a sale at 'Pelts-R-Us' or anything. You got a few men you could send this way?"

"9-1-1? This is the juice...you know, OJ? I was out chipping golf balls in my backyard this evening about 2 am, when this white dude threw a bloody glove over my fence and put a couple of my socks with blood on them in my master bedroom. (Pause) How do I know this? I'm sorry, I think the connection is bad...hello?...hello?"

"9-1-1? Yeah, this is Alec Baldwin, you officious little yellow pig! You are so selfish, answering other people's calls ahead of mine. I'll bet your mother is behind this you fucking little bitch!!"

"Well hello, 9-1-1. This is Al Gore, and ...hee hee...I just ate 5 Big Mac's and released a ton of Brown-House gases. You might want to detail a Haz-Mat team to Central Tennessee."

"Good evening, 4-1-1. This is George Dubbya. Uh, huh. Yup. You got the number to Gorby? What? Nine one one? Hey, can't a guy make a mistake? (Pause) Up yours too!"

"Hey 9-1-1?!!!? Wanna hear something really funny? They just released the DNA reports from one portion of the crime scene, but they exonerated me for everything!! (Pause) I know, it's REALLY stupid. There were 5 major places in the crime, and they only cleared me of the one, yet they closed the book on me! Fuckin' awesome, dude. (Pause) My name? Oh...my bad...Patsy...P-a-t-s-y..."