Friday, February 16, 2007

Today is Friday, unless of course, it isn't

90% of all scientists agree that catastrophic global warming is upon us; it is our fault; and we probably cannot stop the total destruction of the world by the year 2015. Or maybe it's 2025. No, wait...perhaps it's 2052. Or 2076. 2132?

In any event, it has now been decided by the scientists, and if you even question their speculatory gestures, you're considered an evil, hateful, person.

Funny, but I clearly recall my senior year in high school (1975) and we were launching satellites faster than Campbell's was churning out soup cans, because the same scientists were telling us the ice-age was upon us and Maine was only a few short years away from being Key West, etc., etc. The reason for the satellites is because we were trying to measure and record the atmosphere to see if the ice age was being caused by that. We already knew how to warm the earth - we only had to pour cement.

Now here we are 30 years later, and the same folks are back - apologetic about their missed hypothesis of three decades ago - but firm in their resolve that this time, they are 100% correct. Interestingly, these scientists are using very little science in their scientific hyperventilation. You see, if you believe so strongly in something that no one can shake you from that belief under any circumstance, that my friends is what we on Earth call "F-A-I-T-H". Mention faith to a scientist, and be prepared for a dissertation on the existence (or lack of existence) of a God or anything related to faith and belief. Faith does not enter the equation, according to the Chicken-Little's of today. The sky is falling dammit. The sky is falling. And if you don't believe them, they're going to stomp their feet...uhhhhh...stomp their feet again...and uhhhh...stomp their feet a 3rd time. Then they'll come out in 2037 and tell us to bundle up because it's reaaaaalllly friggin cold out, and again it will be our fault that it's snowing in Miami.

So stop asking them to prove their theories. Don't mention things about Solar Cycles [where Earth, Mars, Pluto, and Venus become warmer, while the other planets get cooler]. The cycle, like all cycles (that's why the word means what it does) repeats itself now and then. If you ask a global warmist why it's snowing like a sunovabitch and cows are freezing to death everywhere in the world right now, they'll tell you that's "weather", not "climate". However, they have no issue in noting the fact that the Earth has had some extremely hot summers the past decade, but apparently hot summers are not "weather" like cold and snowy winters are. It's a brilliant position to take, because no matter who says what about whatever, you have the ability to deny the validity of everything, or concur the validity of everything, dependent upon how the wind seems to be blowing at any particular moment.

Wind of course, being "weather", unless for some reason it's not. Get it?

3 comments:

Rebelbelle said...

Got it...

The record low for my area on Feb 15th, 1960 was 18 degrees.

Yesterday it, Feb 15th- 2007, it was 22 degrees.

I think all the hot air coming from the meterologists is what raised the temps around here~

Scary Monster said...

Me don't like scientists.
They be worse than
TV evangelists, competing for a direct link to god.
Babble, babble. Me not sure about global warming, but me is certain that we be messing up this planet. Creating and dumping garbage and pollution so that the world today is looking like Rosie O Donell's armpits

JL4 said...

Well...it's not as bad as Rosie O'Donnell's armpits (what is?)

...but I agree we don't help.