Brrrrrr

East Coast slammed by powerful nor’easter
West Va., N.J. declare emergencies; hundreds of flights canceled. Up to 10 inches of snow in Vt, NH, and Maine.

With temperatures dropping into the low 40's in Central Florida last night, a certified record cold snap for the region, global warming advocates huddled around their pot bellied leader....errrrr....stoves, last night wondering how the hell this could be going on. "Thousands of head of cattle froze to death this winter in the North Texas, Oklahoma, Colorado, Kansas, Nebraska corridor, and we can't seem to find a viable explanation why", global warming spokesperson Cindi Metcalf-Burns-Myers said. "All indications were that we were in the throes of an inconvenient truth", she said while winking at her counterpart, Al. "And for the record, that's Ms. Metcalf-Burns-Meyers".

Sitting at a spread that included a full rack of ribs, four different appetizers, 2 cakes, a large order of fries with gravy, and 3 gallons of rocky road ice cream, Al wiped off his lips long enough to say, "You see, this cold snap is nothing more than a fabrication by the media...a media designed to put fantasy over fact when it comes to me and my cause." When reminded that the media is actually behind him 95% on this one, Al was heard to say, "Really? I didn't know that. Hey, you gonna eat the rest of those mashed potatoes, or can I scarf 'em?"

Meanwhile, in Cleveland, the "Indians" still haven't dug their way out of the 3 feet of snow that fell last week, cancelling all their home games so far, and sending them to Milwaukee, which has a domed stadium. "Thank goodness for that", Indians manager Eric Wedge said. "It snowed 5 inches during Saturday's game alone. I had my entire staff outside, spraying hairspray into the sky, but to no avail. It just kept getting colder and snowing harder. I'm glad Milwaukee had a dome, at least."

From the AP wires