...and then there is the other thing.

There are several categories of lies, each with their own level of deceit and appropriate punishment. For the purposes of this post, we will not be covering lies that are of a felonious nature. We'll skip the obvious ones like whether or not you killed your ex-wife and a waiter, as well as the $118,000.00 ransom note that mom couldn't seem to get past the handwriting analysts. Yeah, yeah, yeah....DNA or whatever. She shit the bed on the handwriting analysis...plain and simple. In any event, those lies carry grave consequences, and we don't need to discuss them. What I'm talking about are the following:

The Self-Preservation Lie: This is when your kid tells you he doesn't know how the $3000 plasma TV got that hole in it...even though you can clearly see the baseball embedded. "Honest to goodness officer, my cruise control was set precisely on 55 mph". Or even, "Yes I smoked it...but I never inhaled it." The Self-Preservation Lie.

The Pin-Prick Lie: This is the lie that stings for a short while, but goes away quickly and causes no harm. "Read my lips: No new Taxes". "If elected, I will create 4 million new jobs a year and balance the budget". "Did I see a $20 bill on the counter? Nope, sure didn't honey." The Pin-Prick Lie.

The Character Flaw Lie: This is the bad one. This is the lie that forever makes everyone around you distrustful and sometimes even despised. These lies are galactically stupid as well, for in today's day and age, a few keystrokes on a PC, and you can find out anything to prove or disprove a spoken or written statement. I once had a friend for years who told me he played football at Penn State. Later on, I discovered he didn't even go to Penn State, and that he played intramural flag football at a pip-squeak college in Georgia.

I was in the Army for 21 years. Fact. I was in combat. Fact. I won the Medal of Honor. Ummmm, no. By telling a Medal Of Honor lie, not only would it be easily refuted through the Internet, I also would have degraded every single person who ever gave their all (and most are awarded posthumously, for the record) to win that award. In other words, I would have told you a character flaw lie, one in which if caught, I could never live down or be looked at by you in the same light again. Ever again. Ever. Thus, The Character Flaw Lie.

Do with the following what you may...I'm just the presenter. The following statements were publicly made by a certain Presidential candidate, all easily proven. All Character Flaw Lies.

"My father was a goat herder." Lie. His father was a well educated man, from a well-to-do family, who worked for the Kenyan Government.

"My Uncle participated in the U.S. liberation of Auschwitz Death Camp." Lie. Auschwitz is in Poland, and US troops never entered Poland. The Russians liberated Auschwitz.

"My grandmother has always been a Christian." Lie. His grandmother - through her own newspaper interviews, said 'I am a strong believer in the Islamic faith.' Not to mention the fact that she was one of 14 wives his father had...which I do believe Christianity frowns upon. I could be wrong though. They might be totally into orgies and shit like that.

"My name is African Swahili." Lie. Barack is Arabic, as is Hussein and Obama.

"I never practiced Islam." Debatable, but when he was in the Islamic school, he damn sure had to fake it at the very least. Still has lie written all over it.

"My school in Indonesia was Christian." Lie. It was a Muslim school, he was registered in the school as a Muslim, and he got into trouble during Koran studies for making faces. The source of this? His own book.

"Because I lived in Indonesia, I have foreign experience." Ahem! We are looking for adult foreign experience, not the memories of ages 6-10. Not a lie, but certainly some serious bullshit.

"An Ebony article moved me to run for office." Lie. Sources at Ebony have not yet been able to identify the article of which he speaks...because it doesn't exist.

"A Life magazine article changed my life." Again, same story...different magazine. Lie. Life (Time/Life publishing) cannot confirm the legitimacy of this statement either. Why? They know not of the article of which he speaks. (Is there a magazine patern here? I'm just askin')

"I was a professor of Law." Lie. He was a senior (grade level) editor and lecturer of the Harvard Law Review, not a full professor.

"Without me, there would be no ethics bill." Lie. He never chaired, participated in, presented, edited, or influenced change, in the Ethics Bill.

"The July 2008 Banking bill was passed by my committee." Lie. It wasn't HIS committee. As a matter of fact, he wasn't even on the banking committee.

"I have released my state records for public review." Lie. As of July 2008, his record of voting in Illinois has not been released publicly or privately.

"My economics bill will change America." Lie. He wrote an economics bill that had 111 provisions in it, and it was voted down 99-0. He voted against it as well. That's right. I didn't mis-type. He voted against his own bill. I have no idea. Why don't you ask him?

"I am not acting as President, yet. Lie. See 'European tour'.

"I didn't visit the wounded soldiers in Germany because I thought it inappropriate to do so." (My call on this one, and I say LIE). You don't like, respect, or even look at soldiers as anything but beneath you, and you know that's the damn truth too.

"I want all the votes to count." Lie. You wanted the delegates votes, not the people's votes. That's how you beat Senator Clinton. She actually kicked your ass, but you got it handed to you by the 'Super-Delegates.'

"I passed 900 bills in the Illinois State Senate." Lie. He passed 26, 19 of which were handed down to him by a fellow Senator. He wrote but 7 himself.

"My campaign never took root in MySpace." Lie. MySpace had a disclaimer against your ads for nearly 4 months.

"I never said the surge wouldn't work. I merely stated that I doubted it." Lie. He said - directly and pointedly - the surge will not work.

"It's true I sat nearly every Sunday for 20 years in that church, but I had no idea the Reverend was as anti-white, anti-Jew, and anti-American as he seems to be." Lie. Nothing further needed.

There are many, many, more character flaw lies, but my shoulders are screaming at me right now to stop typing. I can handle a little bullshit. I can handle a slight increase in taxes - even when promised it won't happen. I can even handle being a white male and therefore somehow personally responsible for every fucked up thing done to people of color and women in the last 250 years.

But I can't trust a character flaw liar. And neither should you, but do as you must. I certainly can't stop you.

Character Flaw. Flawed Character.

Danger Will Robinson....danger.